Person #1 -- I'm sorry we aren't as close as you want us to be. I know I don't put as much effort into our friendship as you do and I don't know why. You're amazing but something just holds me back. I'm sorry. You've been here for me and I haven't exactly been there for you.

Person #2 -- You're amazing! You are the most beautiful, smart, funny, and happy girl I know! You have everything going for you even if you don't see it :] You are pretty much my best friend because I can tell you anything and we have so much fun together. You make me feel like myself and I love you for that.

Person #3 -- I'm sorry I blew you off and I'm sorry I never made the effort to fix things. I am always going to wonder if you would've turned out differently if I had listened to you and talked to you. Everytime I see you I can't help but feel guilty.

Person #4 -- I love you so much! You are such a great person and you inspire me to be better every day! You are so forgiving and loving and you care about everyone. You are the biggest example to me. I'm going to miss you so much when you leave and I can't even think about it because I know I'll start crying. I know you think that sometimes no one cares but I do care. A lot. You are my other best friend.

Person #5 -- I'm sorry for hating you when I know I can't just blame you. But you were so decietful and dumb. You made me hate myself and you try to make others hate me too. Why did you ever let me get into this mess? I'm sorry but I don't think I can forgive you anytime soon.

Person #6 -- You don't see how amazing you are. You are so fun and friendly and everyone who meets you loves you. I wish we were closer but I know that would hurt people.

Person #7 -- I don't feel any sympathy for you. You are a jerk to everyone and try to smooth talk everyone.

Person #8 -- You've inspired me into making choices even though no one would ever guess that. We aren't close and we barely even talk. I don't want you to hurt anyone and I have a hard time trusting you but I am trying.

Person #9 -- All I wanted was an apology and you were too prideful to even give me that.

Person #10 -- Yeah I like you and it sucks. You're amazing and you continue to amaze me. Too bad I know it will never work.

Person #11 -- I'm sorry that I didn't listen to you. You were right. You were way more than right but I didn't want you to. I wanted to learn the lesson on my own and now I always regret it. I should have listened but I didn't and I'm sorry I can't even tell you that I'm sorry for not listening.

Person #12 -- I love you dearly whether I show it or not. You have so much potential. And I admire the way that you've never let anyone else tear you down. But you need to learn to be humble and listen to others. Trust me experiencing life for yourself isn't always fun.

Person #13 -- I'm sorry I didn't answer you. I thought I was stopping the drama but I only made it worse. I don't want our friendship to just end like that.

Person #14 -- I'm sorry for my stupid ideas. They ruined a lot of things and they are one of the things I regret most. You are amazing whether you know it or not. You're not my regret.

Person #15 -- You are the funniest person I know and I love you to death. You are so sweet and loving towards everyone and I love hanging out with you.

Person #16 -- You're a jerk and I'm sorry I wasted my time on you.

Person #17 -- I'm afraid for you. I don't want you to get hurt but I can't tell you that because I don't want to judge you.

Person #18 -- I know I tease you but I don't worry about you in life. I have no doubt that you will go far. You are so strong in the gospel and you know who you are.

Person #19 -- You need to let loose. You're too uptight and you let that keep yourself from showing your true colors. You need to learn to love yourself.

Person #20 -- I love you and we have so much fun together but sometimes I get the feeling that you don't want to be my friend as much as I want to be yours. You are so funny and carefree.

1. I can be insanely shy sometimes so if I don’t talk to you it’s not because I’m stuck up and think I’m better than you, it probably has to do more with the fact that I’m intimidated by you or my surroundings.




2. I am EXTREMELY competitive! If you challenge me to something I can’t resist the urge to win.



3. I cannot be described as a girly girl. Yes I like getting dressed up and all the crap but everything I truly love is far from these lines.



4. My cousin, Shawnie, makes me feel insanely comfortable with who I am. When I’m with her I honestly could care less how I look and I wear a lot less makeup.



5. Music is my therapy. When I’m upset I find a song or two that matches my mood or situation and listen to it over and over again.



6. I find it really hard to open up and show my true colors at school and I am a lot more reserved at school than I am most of the other times.



7. At times I am very critical of myself and other times I am completely happy with who I am.



8. My faith means a lot to me. I am not the most outgoing when it comes to bearing my testimony but I know that the church is true and it is my ultimate comforter. Whenever I am feeling down I think about how much my heavenly father loves me.



9. My fatal flaw: I hold grudges. I try not to but if you offend me deeply I have a hard time coming out of it. I’ve been trying to work on this but I’m not quite as forgiving as I could be.



10. My heroes are my sister Amanda and my uncle Nathan. Amanda because she has a light that shines brightly and everyone can see it and she is just an uplifting person to be around. She is friendly and tries to accept everyone for who they are. I learn so much just by being around her. Nathan because he is so in tune with the gospel. Whenever I have questions I turn to him. He also really cares about me and takes the time to call me and find out how I”m doing.



11. I used to hate hanging out with people and just liked to be home but now I love hanging out with my friends and doing stuff.



12. I love to draw. I’m definitely not good at it or anything but its fun and it helps me to relieve stress.



13. For as much as I hate texting I always find myself wishing that someone will text me.



14. I like to talk about myself but I have a hard time just coming out of the blue and telling you personal stuff. If you ask the right questions though or show that you care then I will probably open up to you and you’ll learn a lot about me that you didn’t know.



15. I am very uncertain about my future. Every few weeks I change my goals. Here is my list of possible things to do in my future: Author, Nurse, Hygienist, Marine Biologist, engineer, psychologist, and the list goes on and on

I want to be an author. I have for as long as I can remember. I'm just afraid to be who I am. I'm afraid to let other people read my writing, I'm afraid that it's all dumb. I wish I was more outgoing and that I didn't care what other people think. I'm tired of it keeping me from my hopes and dreams.

Do you ever just have those weeks where you feel like you're about to die? Not like suicidal, not like your going to kill yourself but more like you're going to get hit by a bus or something like that. It's weird... trust me I don't spend too much time thinking about death but every once and a while I wonder what would happen if I died the next day. Would people miss me? Would I be happy with who I was when I died? stuff like that...

Well the dance last night was awesome! Friggin amazing. I'm not going to lie, at first I really really really didn't want to go but I am glad I did. I'm not going to let them control me because of my past. I AM MOVING ON! heck yes it feels great to say that. I love my friends! They are so much fun and we have such a great time together! Last night was exactly what I have been needing. Man.. I'm going to miss everyone when they go to college... its not fair :'[

I hate when people judge you based on who you used to be. It isn't fair. People change. You make a mistake and there is always that person who things that they can tell your dirty little secret to everyone. It's dumb. Its your secret. You should get to share it. I hate it when they don't know you. They just know what you did or what they saw. One side of the story. But they don't even care to try to figure out who you really are or what happened after the whole thing. They don't feel your shame or your guilt. They label you and tell everyone else. One mistake can never go away because everyone remembers, even when you've long forgotten it. People are hypocrites. They say anybody can change. And yes they can. But no one ever forgets who you used to be. The only way to truly move on is to move and cut all your ties to everyone who knows. But most of the time that never happens.